How parents can assist children throughout a divorce
California parents who are getting a divorce might wonder how they can help their children in the process. Parents who are able to work together to assist their children might begin by agreeing on the best time to file for divorce. This might be during a stretch in the school year when there are few holidays, such as March, when parents can visit their attorneys and take care of other business while children are in school. Conversely, they might decide that summer vacation is the best time because they can spend more time with their children then.
Parents should try to be together when they talk to children about their divorce. They should also focus on reassurance in response to children’s questions. Parents need to balance their own needs with those of their children. This means that if they are feeling stressed, they should seek counseling and avoid sharing these types of details with their children. Family or individual counseling may also help children.
Parents should avoid fighting with each other in front of their children and should consider what the living arrangements will be like. This may involve creating a custody and support agreement. The family could continue living together during the divorce, or the children could continue living in the house while the parents take turns living there.
Whether parents negotiate a divorce with mediation or another cooperative method or go through litigation, if they can remain respectful of one another and work together effectively as coparents, children may adjust better to the situation. A parenting agreement may cover potential areas of conflict, such as extracurricular activities or meeting new significant others. If parents need to make major changes to custody, support or visitation, they may need to return to court to ask for a modification.